One of those nights where I want to sleep but I cannot. I remember a story recently in the news, the story of Milly Dowler who went missing 9 years ago and died at the hands of Levi Bellfield. What keeps going round in my head is her parents remarks after the trail. Giving evidence as witnesses was too high a price to pay! I will come back to this case later.
A question that I would like answered is why nobody in child abuse cases considers the mental murder of a child. The trauma to a child with this crime is never really mentioned or when it is, never in detail or given much thought or recognition. It is merely directed away from our attention the same way you would stop a child viewing violence on the television. We are not children so why is this not given its precedence.
A child is not an adult mentally or physically and where the body heals the mind never does. To commit such a crime to a child will mean that child as it existed no longer exists. The child's childhood ceases. It is a crime that goes without punishment or proper consideration because again I say we cannot admit that some of our kind can commit such a premeditated act of inhumanity. It is never truly examined by us or given any sense of explanation because it is not carried on the outside of the body but on the inside, unseen and unheard much like the crime itself.
Coming back to the Milly Dowler Case, there is far too much redirection in court cases where upon the victim is the one who is somewhat at fault and has in someway encouraged the crime itself. In the case of Milly Dowler the defence apparently placed the blame onto her parents by attacking their reputations.This form of defence is acceptable in our justice system. A family who had their much loved daughter abducted, abused and murdered. Persuaded as witnesses went into the trail of their daughter's abuser and murderer and whilst on the stand had the blame somehow directed onto them in an unbelievable attempt to excuse this mans crime. Has the world gone mad!!!!!
Seemingly not according to the Law. It is OK to do this to enable a fair trail for the Child Abusing Murderer! Fact is the truth is all too ugly for us so we have to find an excuse for it somewhere and as the Dowler family were on the stand and not poor Milly ( who would of been blamed) it was her parents who were left totally humiliated and distraught. The saddest thing of all is the Dowler family have said that if they knew how they were going to be treated they would never of taken the stand so what message has the Justice System sent out to other victims!
As a human being and with common sense my heart goes out to the Dowler family and their lovely Milly.
For me personally I fear for my children.
The denial and ignorance about child abuse needs to be stopped. I think victims and survivors need to write and speak more about how it destroyed their soul. For me there will always be a part inside that is dead. But never give up hope. It will get better for your children. They can heal. You can heal. It just takes time. It may be a life long process...I have been working on it for 22 years. When I started the work, I could not even leave my house. I was in a psychiatric hospital for 9 months and then therapy 5 days a week for 6 months, then 3 days a week for several years. I still struggle but it is better. I am still in therapy...but that is okay.
ReplyDeleteLawyers are manipulative a- holes'...sorry but it is true. They always try to blame the victim. It is their only defense. The world has gone mad...it has been mad for eons. Abuse has been around since forever.
My heart goes out to you and your children. Please take care. You have a lot of people on your side. Do not forget this fact.
Thank you Nico, you always manage to say the right things, you give me hope in this hopeless world, (((hugs))).
ReplyDeleteJust want echo Nico's eloquent words.
ReplyDeleteLife is tough-very. Some of our fellow human beings make it tougher.
Some we could barely call human.
Some like you and others here make it bearable.
Never forget, someone is always willing to help carry the burden.
@sheepfoldcarer
Thank you my friend, wise as always (((hugs)))
ReplyDeleteOH, this is so deep, I have to sit with it a while.
ReplyDeleteWhy do things like this reach so deep inside and yank out the core of my heart.
I came back and re-read this and I must say, I remember how being turned into the criminal on the witness stand actually caused years of mental agony, when the real truth is, we were the victims.
ReplyDeleteIt is really a MAD world that allows this kind of uncontrolled audacity into a courtroom.
We are not capable of a just system and I am so sorry you Pastor Sharon were left with the pain of Justice x
ReplyDelete